Adoption is another option for building a family
We love celebrating with our patients their successes at becoming parents, even if the way they came about it is through adoption. While the adoption journey can be just as stressful and bumpy as infertility treatment for a couple, for many it is all rewarding in the end – a new little bundle to love and care for. Courtney and Greg fully know both sides of this roller-coaster ride, but they have come out the other side with the new loves of their life, Samuel and Caroline.
When Courtney and Greg married they were both in their 30s and settled in life, but they knew they wanted to start a family right away. Seems simple enough – find your soulmate, get married, start a family, spread the love.
But the added wrinkle in this typical life path was that Courtney, a pre-op and recovery nurse and long-time patient at Fertility Answers, had trouble with endometriosis and dysfunctional uterine bleeding for most of her adult life. Several surgeries confirmed endometriosis and a uterine septum which complicated her chances for pregnancy. With this history, she knew that their journey to becoming parents was going to be a struggle and they were not wasting any time in making their dreams of a family a reality.
No more than a month after their wedding, Courtney and Greg had their first appointment with Dr. John Storment. Over the next year they tried two rounds of intrauterine insemination and a cycle of in vitro fertilization with no success. Then, after a lot of thought and consultation plus the unselfish gift of a friend, they decided to give in vitro fertilization another try, this time using Courtney’s best friend Karen as the gestational carrier. They were shattered when, 8 weeks after this IVF procedure, Karen miscarried. “We were all devastated when the second IVF didn’t work,” says Courtney.
After several failed attempts at pregnancy, the couple decided to explore adoption as a way to build a family
Adoption had always been on Courtney’s radar. She knew she wanted at least two children and given her past medical history and difficulty getting pregnant, adoption would provide another option to eventually building her family. A few months after Karen miscarried, she and Greg began the process of meeting with an adoption attorney and the home study review that all adoption parents go through.
Almost immediately after their approval, they were matched with a young pregnant woman and quickly paid the adoption fees and began the process of providing support for the remainder of her pregnancy. But problems with the baby’s father and his run-ins with the law forced them to end the arrangement. Again, they were devastated at this latest roadblock in their quest to create a family.
After this failed adoption, Courtney and Greg were again matched with another soon-to-be-available baby, but this time they kept it a secret, not wanting to jump the gun in case this adoption fell through as well.
Samuel was born in May 2014 and Courtney and Greg were able to be in the delivery room to experience the miracle of his birth. After three excruciating days of waiting the required legal amount of time for the birth mother to have the opportunity to rescind the adoption, Courtney and Greg were able to bring their new baby boy home to meet his extended family who were totally surprised. “Those were the longest three days of my life,” says Courtney about their time waiting without anyone knowing.
When Samuel was about 18 months old, the couple decided they wanted to try another adoption. They contacted their attorney to start the process and were immediately notified about two possible situations. But after looking into both of them more, they just didn’t seem like the right fit for them, so they declined. Then about a month later they received another phone call from their attorney stating they had a birth mother in labor – did they want the baby?
“I still to this day don’t know what made us say yes,” remembers Courtney, “because we absolutely knew nothing about the situation. But we did say yes and have never looked back!” Caroline Eve was born in January of 2016.
Today, Courtney and Greg know their family is complete with two healthy, happy children. “We are so lucky to have them. Samuel and Caroline keep us busy for sure, but we wouldn’t have it any other way.” For Courtney and Greg, adoption provided them with the perfect family.